Spin Around
by MCRK
Summary: Sometimes all you can hope for is to be a little kid again and to spin and spin and spin...


"Everything to Eveyone" is © copyrighted to Everclear, I don't own the song or the characters, all general disclaimers apply. This is a one piece song/fic, this has nothing to do with As the Tears Fell or any of my other stories. There are no names mentioned because although I wrote this as a sailor moon fic, it was originally published as an original work. Enjoy and review please!  
  
Spin Around  
  
You put yourself in stupid places  
  
Yes I think you know its true.  
  
Situations where its easy to look down on you.  
  
I think you like to be the victim  
  
I think you like to be in pain  
  
I think you make yourself a victim  
  
Almost every single day  
  
Her eyes opened slowly as she lifted her head away from the wall, keeping her body curled into the protective ball that it had automatically formed as soon as her body had fallen prey to sleep. She had been here enough times to know what might happen if she fell asleep without that instinct and a chill ran down her spine at the thought. She turned her eyes over to the clinking noise in front of her.  
  
"You're free.and let's hope its your last time back." The plump but remarkably callous guard motioned for her to stand up and come forward.  
  
As she walked closer to the door to her freedom, her eyes connected with his, and they held for a second, only being pulled away when the bars slid open, crossing their line of vision. She stood there mulling over her options, the torturous world on one side, the bloodthirsty cell on the other. For a long moment she was torn between the two, not knowing which would be worse, but finally, with his silent acceptance, she left the building. That was all she had ever wanted; his acceptance.  
  
You do what you do  
  
You say what you say  
  
You try to be everything to everyone  
  
You know all the right people  
  
You play all the right games  
  
You always try to be  
  
Everything to everyone  
  
After a few tries and a string of muttered curses, the engine of the old beat up toyota turned over and the car was eased out of the desolate parking lot. As the building grew smaller and smaller in the rearview mirror, the silence between the two grew thicker and thicker and not until the structure was completely out of view did he break the thickness with his gentle and ever soothing voice. "Are you okay?"  
  
She made no head movement to respond but quietly spoke. "I'm fine. I know how to handle myself you know."  
  
He sighed. "Don't get defensive okay? I just want to make sure you aren't hurt."  
  
"Well, I'm not."  
  
The car fell back into silence and only the soft hum of the engine could be heard as they whizzed along the dark highway, lit by the few scattered street lights. It was only than that she realized how late it really was and how annoyed he must be at having to come out and get her.again.  
  
"I'm sorry I made you come out and get me so late. I should have waited till morning." She said, immediately getting aggravated with herself.  
  
"No don't get mad at yourself. It's not a big deal." He said shaking his head. "It never is." He added softly to himself.  
  
Yeah you do it again  
  
You always do it again  
  
"Why didn't you just call Jake?" He questioned.  
  
"They only give you one phone call you know." She said quietly.  
  
"I know.that's why I was wondering why you called me. I would have thought you have asked Jake to come and get you."  
  
"Yeah well.I kinda needed to call someone who would actually come." She said quietly, glancing over quickly to catch the disapproving and disappointed look that he desperately tried to hide.  
  
She leaned her head against the seat and looked at the window, wanting to hit herself for failing him again. She ignored the fact that she was only with Jake because of him and focused on the fact that she had failed him.as always.  
  
You say they taught you how to read and write  
  
They taught you how to count  
  
I say they taught you how to buy and sell  
  
Your own body by the pound  
  
I think you like to be their simple toy  
  
I think you love to play the clown  
  
I think you are blind to the fact  
  
That the hand you hold  
  
Is the hand that holds you down  
  
"You haven't come around the house in a while." He glanced over at her briefly. "We miss your visits."  
  
I She thought silently as she stared out the window. "Yeah.I've been meaning to drop in, but I've been a little bit busy." She said, trying to keep the sarcastic drip out of her voice, knowing that he would ignore it anyway.  
  
"Busy hanging out with those lowlifes you consider friends? Are they the ones that got you into this again tonight?" He asked in anger. A moment of silence passed between the two before he sighed. "I'm sorry, its none of my business."  
  
She continued to stay silent, refusing to admit that he was just as he was right, he was also wrong. Her mind screamed that it was really his fault, how it was the longing and the despair and the loneliness that *he* caused that made her lash out and seek them.leading her to other things as well. Her mind screamed the words but her lips remained sealed. She could never tell him, never let him in on the secret; he knew far to much already.  
  
You do what you do  
  
You say what you say  
  
You try to be everything to everyone  
  
You know all the right people  
  
You play all the right games  
  
You always try to be  
  
Everything to everyone  
  
"Why.why do you always have to be so stubborn?" He muttered softly, hands gripping the wheel tightly, pouring our his anger into the peeling leather wheel.  
  
"Excuse me?" She asked softly, pulling her eyes away from the window and looking over at him, her dark eyes burning into him.  
  
He refused to take his eyes off of the road, refused to meet the burning embers that longed to be ignited. "I was wondering why you always have to be so stubborn."  
  
"I'm not stubborn." She said, her defensive comment immediately slipping from her tongue before her mind had a chance to process the thought.  
  
He sighed. "See, there you go again. Always so stubborn."  
  
She looked down at her hands, which were folded in her lap, ashamed that everything she seemed to do tonight was wrong. "Why.I mean how was I being stubborn before that though?" She asked quietly. "What did I do wrong now?"  
  
"Why is that you keep refusing our help? Everyone wants to help you so god damn much." He blurted out immediately regretting the harsh words, hoping that it wouldn't hurt her any more than he knew he already had tonight.  
  
"Everyone?" She asked quietly. "You mean you and her, your help."  
  
He shook his head. "Not just the two of us, anyone of us, you know that any of them would be willing to help you if you would just ask someone for it."  
  
She shook her head. "No. They just say that, no one really wants to give me any help. No one wants to have to admit that they know someone like me well enough to give me help. No one."  
  
"Maybe if you would just give them half a chance.they would." He said softly.  
  
"I'm sorry.what did you say?"  
  
"Nothing." He said just as quietly. "Nothing at all."  
  
Spin around and fall down  
  
Do it again  
  
You stumble and you fall  
  
Yeah why don't you ever learn  
  
Spin around and fall down  
  
Do it again  
  
You stumble and you fall  
  
I wonder if you will ever learn  
  
"So how is she?" She asked, her voice holding a hint of emotion in it as she desperately tried to keep it in check.  
  
"How is who?" He asked in confusion.  
  
"Your wife."  
  
He glanced over at her. "She has a name you know."  
  
She rolled her eyes. "Yeah well I can't remember a time where she dragged herself away from you long enough to tell me it."  
  
"What do you have against my wife?" He asked, trying not to let himself switch into defensive mode.  
  
She looked over at him with a smile flirting across her lips. "I thought she had a name?"  
  
He shook his head. "She does, you know what, let's forget I ever brought this up."  
  
"You didn't, I did." She responded.  
  
"Fine than I'm ending it okay?" He asked, slightly annoyed.  
  
She curled her feet up onto the seat and returned to her window gazing. "Fine.not like I have anything to say about her anyway."  
  
Why won't you ever learn  
  
Come on now  
  
Do that stupid dance for me  
  
"So what was it this time anyway?" He asked, leaning over and turning off the heat that had sufficiently heated up the car.  
  
She looked over at him. "They didn't tell you?"  
  
He shook his head. "I don't ask. They don't tell."  
  
"Oh.it wasn't anything big."  
  
"It got you in jail didn't it?"  
  
"I got caught trying to buy alcohol with a fake id." She explained.  
  
"That doesn't sound so bad." He started to say.  
  
"And than I kinda started a fire in the building." She blurted out quietly.  
  
"What?!" He exclaimed looking over at her. "What the hell did you do that for?"  
  
She hung her head against the window as a small tear rolled down her cheek at the disapproval. "I was angry, there was fighting, I didn't really think about it."  
  
He sighed. "Was anyone hurt."  
  
She shook her head. "Not physically anyway." She added softly afterwards.  
  
"At least.at least everyone is okay." He said after a long silence between the two.  
  
Neither of them missed the disappointed look in his eyes.  
  
You do what they tell you to do  
  
You say what they say  
  
You try to be  
  
Everything to everyone  
  
"What do you miss the most about being a little kid?" Her quiet voice cut through the silence like a knife, startling him.  
  
"What do I miss?" He asked.  
  
She nodded. "From when you were a little boy."  
  
He was silent for a minute. "I don't know, I never really thought about it." He looked over at the girl next to him, curled up on the fading and tearing seat, and saw the scared little girl that she still really was. "What do you miss the most?" He asked.  
  
She gave a half smile. "I miss spinning."  
  
"Spinning?"  
  
"Yeah.you know.spinning around and around and around until finally you collapse cause you're so dizzy and you just lay there while the world spins around without you, leaving you in your own little paradise for a few moments. That's what I miss."  
  
He nodded. "That's a pretty good thing to miss."  
  
Her smile grew a little wider. "I think so too."  
  
You jump through the big hoop  
  
You play all the right games  
  
You try to be  
  
everything to everyone  
  
The car started to slow to a stop as the familiar building came into view. It rolled to a complete stop right in front and the car was turned off.  
  
Silence passed between the two for a moment, as it always did at this point in the journey, neither of them ever knew what to say.  
  
"I'm sorry again that you had to come and get me." She said softly, looking up at him. "But thank you." Her eyes shone with more gratitude than she could ever express in words.just as they always did. She gathered her jacked and moved her hand over to the handle, preparing to open the door and walk away, but knowing that he would ask her, just as he always did.  
  
His hand shot out and grabbed hold of her, making her turn those ember eyes back on him once again. "Why don't you let me take you home for the night? We would be glad to have you."  
  
She pasted a smile on. "No, really, I'll be fine. I can take care of myself."  
  
"Just for tonight, please." He pleaded.  
  
She shook her head. "Really, I'll be fine.thanks again."  
  
He nodded and let go of her hand, allowing her to get out of the car and he watched to make sure that she got inside before starting the car once more. He sighed as he looked at the door through which she had disappeared one more time before he left. Maybe this would be the last time.  
  
...and maybe not.  
  
spin around and fall down  
  
do it again  
  
you stumble and you fall  
  
yeah you do it again  
  
spin around and fall down  
  
do it again  
  
you stumble and you fall...  
  
_FIN_  
  
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This was written a while ago, about two years, and in case you didn't realize, it's about Rei and Mamoru and just her unrequited love for him and yeah. I'm guessing you can figure the rest out. Hope you enjoyed it, review please! 


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